Wednesday, December 21, 2011
Friday, September 9, 2011
Thursday, September 8, 2011
Wednesday, September 7, 2011
Living in NY NY
Just when you thought there was no good reason to live there
http://coedtoplesspulpfiction.wordpress.com/
http://coedtoplesspulpfiction.wordpress.com/
Tuesday, September 6, 2011
Friday, September 2, 2011
Thursday, September 1, 2011
One morning the husband returns after several hours of fishing and decides to take a nap. Although not familiar with the lake, the wife decides to take the boat out. She motors out a short distance, anchors and begins to read her book.Along comes a game warden in his boat. He pulls up alongside the woman and says "Good morning Ma'am, what are you doing?"
"Reading a book," she replies.(Thinking isn't that obvious) "You're in a restricted NO fishing area", he informs her. "I'm sorry officer, but I'm not fishing, I'm reading."
"Yes, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment. I'll have to take you in and write you up."
"If you do that, I'll have to charge you with sexual assault," says the woman.
But I have not even touched you," says the game warden.
"That's true, but you have all the equipment. For all I know you could start at any moment."
Tuesday, August 30, 2011
Monday, August 29, 2011
Tuesday, August 23, 2011
A Day I Remember
You can have your Army Kakis…You can have your Navy Blues
For I’m a better fighting man, to introduce to you.
My uniform is different… The finest ever seen
The Germans called me “Devil Dog”
My real name is “MARINE”.
I was born on Parris Island, The land that God forgot
The sand is 18 inches deep, The sun… It’s blazing hot.
We wake up every morning, Before the rising sun
To march 100 miles or more, before the day is done.
So listen all you ladies… to what I have to say
Go get yourself a good Marine
For each and every day
He’ll love you and he’ll kiss you
He’ll never be untrue.
There’s nothing in this whole, wide world
A Marine cannot do.
And when I get to heaven, St. Peter I will tell,
“A Good Marine reporting Sir,
I’ve spent my time in Hell”.
And as I look around me… Oh what do I see?
One hundred thousand more Marines.
All Standing next to me…
MARINES
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Pay Day
I would Gladly Pay You Tuesday....
for a Hamburger Today.
I tried to sit and watch cartoons with Colin, my almost 4 year old Grandson the other night.
Did you ever try to watch "SpongeBob Squarepants".
Now mind you he laughed for the full hour.
I spent 1 hour trying to do two things.
One... Make sence of it.
Two... See any humor at all in it.
Where did the funny cartoons of our Era go too.
Monday, August 15, 2011
They want me to Think Green
I've been saying for years that poor people were the original "green" people and we did it better!
Subject: How Wasteful the Older Generation Was! Ha
In the line at the store, the cashier told the older woman that she should bring her own grocery bag because: plastic bags weren't good for the environment. The woman apologized and explained, "We didn't have the green thing back in my day."
The clerk responded, "That's our problem today. Your generation did not care enough to save our environment."
He was right, that generation didn't have "the green thing" in its day.
Back then, they: returned their milk bottles, soda bottles and beer bottles to the store. The store sent them back to the plant to be washed and sterilized and refilled, so it could use the same bottles over and over.
But they didn't have the green thing back in that customer's day.
In her day, they: we walked up stairs, because they didn't have an escalator in every store and office building. They walked to the grocery store and didn't climb into a 300-horsepower machine every time they had to go two blocks.
But she was right. They didn't have the green thing back in that customer's day. Back then, they: washed the baby's diapers because they didn't have the throw-away kind. They: dried clothes on a line, not in an energy gobbling machine burning up 220 volts – wind and solar power really did dry the clothes. Kids got hand-me-down clothes from their brothers or sisters, not always brand-new clothing.
But that old lady is right; they didn't have the green thing back in that customer's day. Back then, they: had one TV, or radio, in the house - not a TV in every room.. And the TV had a small screen the size of a handkerchief, not a screen the size of the state of Montana. In the kitchen, they blended and stirred by hand because they didn't have electric machines to do everything for you.
When they packaged a fragile item to send in the mail, they: used a wadded up old newspaper to cushion it, not Styrofoam or plastic bubble wrap.
But, they didn't have the green thing back then. Back then, we didn't fire up an engine and burn gasoline just to cut the lawn. They used a push mower that ran on human power. They: exercised by working so they didn't need to go to a health club to run on treadmills that operate on electricity.
But she's right; they didn't have the green thing back then. They: drank from a fountain when they were thirsty instead of using a cup or a plastic bottle every time they had a drink of water. They: refilled their writing pens with ink instead of buying a new pen, and they: replaced the razor blades in a razor instead of throwing away the whole razor just because the blade got dull.
But they didn't have the green thing back then.
Back then, people took the streetcar or a bus and kids rode their bikes to school or rode the school bus instead of turning their moms into a 24-hour taxi service.
They: had one electrical outlet in a room, not an entire bank of sockets to power a dozen appliances. And they: didn't need a computerized gadget to receive a signal beamed from satellites 2,000 miles out in space in order to find the nearest pizza joint.
But isn't it sad, that the current generation laments how wasteful the old folks were just because they didn't have the green thing back then?
Friday, August 12, 2011
Sun Rise...
Sun set..
A walk on the beach
To get our feet wet.
Your hand in mine,
My heart you hold.
We walk along
As we get old.
Sun Rise
Sun set.
I thank the Lord
For the day we met.
So glad to have
You by my side.
My love for you
I shouldn't hide.
Sun Rise...
Sun Set.
I love you so
Don’t you know?
Walk with me along the sand.
Shoulder to shoulder
Hand in hand.
Sun Rise...
Sun Set.
I do recall
The day we met.
Our life together that we have
Troubles and pleasures
And calculated measures.
All for our cause
Take a moment and pause.
Remember the day
You decided to stay.
Remembering too
When you said “I Do…”
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Advice to an old guy...
An old guy was working out in the gym when he spotted a sweet young thing...
He asked the trainer that was nearby, "What machine in here should I use to impress that sweet thing over there?"
The trainer looked him up and down and said, "I would try the ATM in the lobby."
Friday, August 5, 2011
School Visit
Subj: School Visit
This one will make you chuckle!!!
The following story is blatantly political and I know that you are fair-minded and a little sick of all the political blather. But just to show that you haven’t completely lost your sense of humor, read it anyway…it’s a hoot.
Obama goes to a primary school to talk to the kids to get a little PR. After his talk he offers question time. One little boy puts up his hand and Obama asks him his name. "Stanley," responds the little boy. "And what is your question, Stanley?"
"I have 3 questions: First, why did the USA Bomb Libya without the support of the Congress? Second, why are you President when John McCain got more votes? Third, why are we so worried about gay-marriage when 1/2 of all Americans Don’t have health insurance? Just then, the bell rings for recess... Obama informs the kiddies that they will continue after recess.
When they resume Obama says, "OK, where were we? Oh, that's right: question time... Who has a question?" Another little boy puts up his hand. Obama points him out and asks him his name. "Steve," he responds.
"And what is your question, Steve?" Actually, I have 5 questions. First, why did the USA Bomb Libya without the support of the Congress? Second, why are you President when John McCain got more votes? Third, why are we so worried about gay marriage when 1/2 of all Americans don't have health insurance? Fourth, why did the recess bell go off 20 minutes early? Fifth, what the Hell happened to Stanley?"
Thursday, August 4, 2011
Thirsty Thursday Toast
Photo by Scott MooreRaise your Glass and hold it high.
Turn your eyes toward the sky.
Now think of friends far and wide,
And happiness will coincide.
Brothers Sisters, Mom and Dad,
All contribute... good and bad.
Remember those from long ago
And your list of friend will really grow.
We've all moved on to live our life
Facing challenge and strife.
But the real constant that we face
is whom we choose to share our place.
Acquaintances come and go
Real friends will never... though.
So as we share this toast today.
Remember all the friends we met along the way.
Dedicated to Dawn
My oldest friend on face book
Saturday, July 30, 2011
Little Girl got her Dream Come True
A week of equestrian camp
Trail riding
On the Lead Horse
Trick Riding
Riding like a Pro
Friday, July 29, 2011
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Saturday, July 23, 2011
Love is Blind
My Daughter should read some of this....
What is a relationship without trust
What kind of a foundation is made of lies.
Beaten and Battered, and crying out loud
Endless arguments. and oh..."Those Good-Byes".
Another day comes
and it starts all over again
and so I ask
it will never end.
A struggle for power
no sence of control
everything is lost
including your soul.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Thursday, July 14, 2011
Wednesday, July 6, 2011
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Repost for Cynda as she prepares for surgery Friday
I don’t want to build an empire, or a kingdom with a thrown.
But I want to build a fortress, that I can call our home.
With strong protective walls to hold in the heat
And thick wool carpet, to feel beneath my feet.
Life is tough enough, to cope with every day
Without a roof overhead to protect the children at play.
Every Day I strive so hard, to improve upon my life,
This is all that I can do, to protect my loving wife.
The children ask for so little
And my wife, you ask for less.
Day to day I keep trying
And never ever under duress.
I promised too,
protect and cherish you
I hope I’ve done ok
I want to take away your pain
And comfort you each day.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
I recall my first time with a condom.
I recall my first time with a condom. I was 16. I went in to buy a pack of condoms at the Rexall Drug store. In those days it took a lot of guts to go in a store and ask for that kind of item because everyone in town knew me and there was no doubt the young lady (I think her name was Delores) knew what they were for.
She was working behind the counter. It was late and the pharmacist had already left.
Delores could see that I was really embarrassed by the whole procedure. She handed me the package and asked if I knew how to wear one. I answered honestly, No, not really.
So she unwrapped the package, took one out and slipped it over her thumb. She cautioned me to make sure it was on tight and secure.
Apparently I still looked confused. So, she looked all around the store to see if it were empty. It was. Just a minute, she said, and walked to the door and locked it. Taking my hand, she led me into the back room, unbuttoned her blouse and removed it. She unhooked her bra and laid it aside. Do these excite you? she asked without mbarrassment.
Well, I was so dumb-struck that all I could do was stand there with my mouth gaping open and nod my head. She then said it was time to slip the condom on.
As I was slipping it on, she dropped her skirt, removed her panties and lay down on a desk. Well, come on, she said, We don't have much time.
So I climbed on her. It was so wonderful that, unfortunately, I could no longer hold back and KAPOW! I was done within a few moments.
She looked at me with a bit of a frown. Did you put that condom on correctly? she asked. I said, Sure did, and held up my thumb to show her.
She then beat the shit out of me...
Women have always been hard for me to figure out.
Friday, June 3, 2011
Inspiration
We mortals don our winter wear.
In Spring, when trees begin to dress,
We mortals then start wearing less,
Until, for some, with Summer's heat
The role reversal is complete.
"GOD furnished me this suit...and i am proud to display it."
"If you want to talk about open mindedness, take off your clothes."
A borrowed Poem
There was once a young woman named Rose
Who enjoyed taking off all her clothes.
On her bike she would ride
Not ashamed of her hide
From her nose to her cute little toes.
It was summertime sweltering heat
Which made Rose expose more than her feet.
"Why, I haven't a care
Wearing only the air!"
She exclaimed as she rode down the street.
All the townspeople gathered to stare
Such a sight was incredibly rare.
'Cause this ample young girl
On her head had no curl
A Godiva with very short hair.
Soon the story spread out far and wide
Many others joined in for the ride
"Unless you are a prude
Being nude is not rude"
Rose explained with a heart full of pride.See More
Who enjoyed taking off all her clothes.
On her bike she would ride
Not ashamed of her hide
From her nose to her cute little toes.
It was summertime sweltering heat
Which made Rose expose more than her feet.
"Why, I haven't a care
Wearing only the air!"
She exclaimed as she rode down the street.
All the townspeople gathered to stare
Such a sight was incredibly rare.
'Cause this ample young girl
On her head had no curl
A Godiva with very short hair.
Soon the story spread out far and wide
Many others joined in for the ride
"Unless you are a prude
Being nude is not rude"
Rose explained with a heart full of pride.See More
Thursday, June 2, 2011
Summer Time.... and the living is easy
In this day and age, it's so easy to follow the norm. The easy road is a safe path to follow. I avoid change because it is less confusing and less stressful. But I think I need more. I know I want more. I long for a vacation, but when I have time off, I stay close to home. This summer let me head out. I want to leave, and leave my cell phone behind. I want to go somewhere I've never been, or some place I've been before and dreamt of returning to. I don't want to go alone, but I do not want a schedule either. I want the dawn to tell me to get up, and fatigue to tell me when to sleep. Let me experience adventure. I want to see all there is to see.
Fill my camera with film. I'll pack extra batteries. I want to capture the beauty of life and store it away to be enjoyed again when everyday life tries to wear me down. And now I'll tell you what. Keep looking here for reports. I want to share every day as... this is "Not Just Another Day".
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
Thursday, May 26, 2011
A memo to my wife
I don’t want to build an empire, or a kingdom with a thrown.
But I want to build a fortress, that I can call our home.
With strong protective walls to hold in the heat
And thick wool carpet, to feel beneath my feet.
Life is tough enough, to cope with every day
Without a roof overhead to protect the children at play.
Every Day I strive so hard, to improve upon my life,
This is all that I can do, to protect my loving wife.
The children ask for so little
And my wife, you ask for less.
Day to day I keep trying
And never ever under duress.
I promised too,
protect and cherish you
I hope I’ve done ok
I want to take away your pain
And comfort you each day.
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Monday, May 23, 2011
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Some people consider me different
Some people consider me different
some others call me strange.
But I enjoy all the things that others do
and I'm not about to change.
I love to swim and I love the beach
and I even love to dance.
Most of all I enjoy my time with friends
and I do when I have the chance
Thew only difference that I can see
is just what others see.
So look and see what others see
right in front of their nose
The difference is so simplely
I do them all without my clothes.
Wednesday, May 18, 2011
Monday, May 16, 2011
When she asks me to come, I follow.
If she tells me to look, I open my eyes wide.
when she tells me, "I'm so lonely"
I stand by her side.
She asks for so little
but offers so much.
I know that she loves me
I feel her touch.
She holds in her hands, the future.
a little impatient, yet alert.
She seems both fearless and inquizitive
but oh so easily hurt.
My job is to hold and protect her
a job I willingly accept
Sometime I feel I'm only one
Ready to protect
Friday, May 13, 2011
Her Special Gift
She was a kind lady, We barely knew,
And Yet we loved her so.
She had a gift she alway shared,
Beacuse she really cared.
She openened her home, and her heart
and since that day, in mind, we've never been apart.
So now in her passing, its sadness we feel,
A void, a hurt that will take so long to heal.
All the good memories will get us through,
these times of feeling blue.
So to all of us you leave behind
You're heavy on our mind
God rest your soul
you've gone to a better place
be free of pain now, you've paid your toll
Thursday, May 12, 2011
Idol March to the Final Three
It's come down to these four and they all should have a career ahead of them. But who'll go home tonight?
Now the girls should both move on. Both are highly diversified in style and ability. They are both nightengales.
James is wild beyond the others. My vote for defeat... has to go to Scotty... But I'm never right. Good luck to all of them they deserve to be there.
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